The Bet We Played，When She Stopped Craving Love

My lovers were brothers. Right before the wedding, the older brother, Ethan, broke up with me yet again. The next second, my phone rang with a call from the younger brother, Lucas: "Autumn, let's get back together." Five years. This was already the ninth time. They always did this. One would string me along right up to the wedding and dump me, while the other swooped in right on cue to beg for reconciliation, over and over again. I often felt like I wasn't their lover, but a shared toy passed between brothers. Yet I was too desperate for love. Even knowing it was a fire pit, I jumped in time and time again. Until that night, when I overheard them chatting with Chloe, the adopted heiress. "It's been five years. Why hasn't Autumn completely lost her mind yet? Only three days left on our bet. If you guys lose, you owe me a sports car." Ethan chuckled softly. "Deal. I'll even buy you a yacht." Lucas played right along with her reckless banter: "Don't worry, I plan on leaving her at the altar this time. She'll definitely snap!" I listened quietly from start to finish. No tears, no scene. Suddenly, I just stopped craving love. I quietly quit my job, packed my bags, and cut off all contact. When they finally found me again years later, I merely flashed the ring on my finger. Politely, I declined: "Sorry, no getting back together this time." "I'm married." They were engrossed in their conversation out on the banquet terrace, completely oblivious to my presence. I stood right by the doorway, quietly recording everything on my phone from start to finish. It wasn't until a passing server softly called out to me: "Miss, are you alright? You look really pale. Do you need any help?" The voices inside cut off abruptly. A moment later, Lucas pushed the door open. Seeing me, he wrapped an arm tenderly around my waist and smiled: "Autumn, what are you doing out here?" "It's breezy out. You're not feeling well, so let me take you inside and get you a hot drink to warm up." I didn't pull away. I let him lead me by the hand, just staring blankly at his profile. Out of nowhere, I asked: "Lucas, do you actually love me?" His steps hitched for a split second. Then, without missing a beat, he replied firmly: "Of course I love you!" "The second my brother broke up with you, I rushed right over to beg for you back, and I threw myself into planning our wedding. How could I not love you?" "Don't worry, Autumn. I won't run away before the wedding like in the past. Tomorrow we'll go look at wedding dresses, and we'll tie the knot this very weekend!" I opened my mouth, then closed it. Honestly, Lucas was a terrible actor. The words "I love you" poured endlessly from his lips. Yet in his eyes, there wasn't a trace of affection. In the end, I just smiled and said nothing. Back inside the ballroom, I sat down in a quiet corner while Lucas eagerly volunteered to fetch me a hot drink. The ringing in my ears persisted, and my temples throbbed violently. I opened my clutch to rummage through it, but the medication my psychiatrist prescribed wasn't there. Lucas had forced this designer bag on me, stuffing it with all sorts of useless junk. He had no idea I was sick, so naturally, he hadn't packed my pills. I let out a helpless sigh, looking down at the engagement ring on my middle finger to distract myself. Lucas had clearly bought it on a whim. It was way too big. It hung loosely on my finger, ill-fitting and awkward. Then, my downcast gaze caught a pair of polished leather shoes stepping close. I looked up. It was Ethan. Chloe had her arm affectionately looped through his, smiling at me: "What a coincidence. Are you and Lucas here for the gala too?" "I heard you two are having your wedding this weekend. Huge congratulations! You literally just broke up with Ethan and now you're rushing to marry Lucas. Are you really that desperate to be loved?" Beside her, Ethan kept a rigid face and echoed: "Congratulations." My head pounded horribly. I had no energy to engage with either of them. Pretending not to notice the venom dripping from Chloe's words, I replied casually: "Thank you." "If you have time, you're welcome to come watch." It was an outright lie. I had zero intention of going through with the wedding. The three of them had teamed up to play me for five whole years. Now that it was ending, it was only fair that I played them back. I was going to ditch them first.Chloe clearly wasn't going to let me brush her off so easily. Her gaze drifted down to my clutch, and she gasped with exaggerated theatricality: "Wait, did you buy this clutch too?" "Lucas gave me one yesterday, but why did you end up with the promotional gift version? Yours is just studded with cheap rhinestones. It's totally worthless." I froze for a second, glancing between hers and the one in my lap. One was high-end art; the other was a tacky, low-grade freebie. Night and day. The buzzing in my ears seemed to spike, and I answered softly: "I didn't buy it. Lucas gave it to me as a makeup gift." Seeing the light fade from my eyes, Chloe smirked with satisfaction. Just then, Lucas returned carrying a warm cup. Chloe immediately turned to tease him: "Lucas, honestly, what are you doing?" "How come you gave me the real luxury bag, but handed Autumn the promotional freebie? Look, the rhinestones are practically falling off. It makes her look so cheap." Lucas handed me the drink, his smile turning awkward and strained. "I... I didn't overthink it back then. I just thought this style suited her better. Autumn, you're not mad, are you? If you want, I can take you to buy a brand-new one right now." "No wonder I rarely saw you carry it. You didn't like it, did you?" I took the warm drink. Glancing down at the clutch, I shook my head: "I love it." "In fact, I love it so much that I couldn't bear to wear it out." "Lucas, this is the very first gift I've ever received in my entire life." With that, I looked up and gave him a gentle smile. Lucas froze instantly, looking as though the quiet sorrow in my eyes had stabbed him straight in the chest. A long, heavy silence hung between us. Finally, he reached down to take my hand, murmuring an apology: "I'm sorry, Autumn. I'll get you way more gifts in the future, better ones, I swear." I had stopped caring a long time ago. Instead, I played the understanding fiancée, soothing him gently: "It's fine. I'm already grateful." Chloe's smile vanished. She hadn't expected the moment to turn tender. Even Ethan's face darkened beside them, his eyes boring holes into our intertwined hands. Suddenly, Ethan spoke up: "Lucas, didn't you buy that ring too big?" "I remember Autumn's middle finger is a size 6." "That size looks more like... Chloe's." Before I could even react, Chloe grabbed my hand. She eagerly slid the ring off my finger and slipped it onto her own. A perfect fit. The ring was clearly bought for her in the first place. Chloe beamed triumphantly, practically gloating: "Lucas, I'm obsessed with this!" "And it's crazy that it's my exact size. Why don't you talk to Autumn for me? Ask her to just give it to me." It was a blatant, shameless slap in the face. Even Ethan cast a sidelong glance at Chloe, as if finding the demand a bit over the top. Yet he didn't stop her. Lucas looked torn. "Chloe, I'll buy you the exact same one later." "This is the engagement ring for Autumn." Chloe's eyes flared with anger, throwing a childish tantrum: "But I want this one!" "I don't care! If you don't get this ring for me, I'm never talking to you again! Are you just looking down on me because I'm adopted? You won't even give me a stupid ring!" Lucas had always spoiled Chloe rotten. Hearing her whine, he turned to coax me instead: "Autumn, I know you're always the mature one. Can you just let Chloe have it this once..." Such a familiar script. Lucas, Ethan, and even my biological parents had repeated those exact words a thousand times. "Autumn, you're the sensible one. Just yield to Chloe." "Be a good girl, Autumn. Let your sister have it first, and Mom and Dad will buy you a new one next time." "Autumn, of course we love you. You're both our daughters, but Chloe has a delicate temper. Just put up with it for her sake." ... Halfway through his sentence, the screeching tinnitus in my ears completely drowned out Lucas's voice. My skull felt like it was splitting open. Lucas's mouth kept moving, opening and closing, but I couldn't hear a single word. I just let out a quiet sigh. Voluntarily, I said: "If she likes it, she can keep it." "Excuse me, I'm not feeling well. I'm heading home to rest."With that, I turned and walked straight toward the ballroom exit. The ringing left me dizzy and nauseous; I knew I needed to take my medication immediately. Footsteps hurried after me. I assumed it was Lucas, but it turned out to be Ethan. He caught up and held my arm to steady me, asking: "Is your head pounding again? Where are your pills?" "I've noticed your symptoms getting worse, and you've lost so much weight. What did the specialist say?" Severe depression. Accompanied by somatic symptoms and neurogenic tinnitus. The exact words from my diagnosis flashed across my mind. Shaking my head, I replied: "At home. I forgot to bring them. It's fine, just the same old thing." "Where's Lucas?" Ethan pressed his lips together, clearly annoyed that I had brought up his brother. His tone turned sharp: "He's talking to Chloe, trying to get that ring back for you." "Forget about him. I'll drive you home." I didn't argue. If the pain worsened, I feared I'd collapse right there on the pavement. Stumbling through my apartment door, I reached desperately for the pill bottle. Ethan poured a glass of water and handed it to me. Seeing how deathly pale I looked, he couldn't help but ask: "What is this illness really? You've gone through at least seven or eight of these bottles. You can't keep living like this—are you treating your body like a walking pharmacy? I know Dr. Miller, the chief of psychiatry. I'll set up a full checkup for you." "Autumn, stop running away from medical help." I washed the pills down with warm water. Swallowing too quickly, a violent wave of nausea surged up my throat. I shoved Ethan's supporting hand away, barely choking out a breathless whisper: "Bathroom!" Ethan watched my frail, trembling back, his brows knitting tightly together. Seeing the bathroom door slam shut, he walked over, unscrewed the medication bottle, and tipped two pills into his palm. He slipped them into his pocket. Immediately, he tapped out a message to Dr. Miller: [I have some medication. I need you to analyze its chemical composition.] Pausing for a second, Ethan added another line: [Urgent.] When I finally emerged from the bathroom, some color had returned to my face, and the throbbing headache and ringing were temporarily dampened. Ethan didn't linger. After telling me to get some rest, he left. I nodded, swallowed a couple of sleeping pills, and pulled the covers over my head to sleep. The next morning, the alarm woke me. I took my resignation letter to the office, wrapped up my exit interview, and then met with my landlady, Mrs. Gable, to discuss breaking my lease early. Mrs. Gable was a sweet, kindhearted woman. I had run into her at the clinic before. Right as I walked out of the therapy wing, I saw her guiding her daughter, who was battling severe postpartum depression. We had shared a quiet, knowing look. Mrs. Gable had taken one look at my hollow expression and understood everything. She hadn't pressed, just made gentle small talk like nothing was out of the ordinary. The following month, she concocted a random excuse to lower my rent. Hearing that I was moving out to travel and clear my head, Mrs. Gable smiled, but tears welled up in her eyes: "Go have fun, and stay safe. Don't do anything... dangerous, okay?" "If you ever come back to visit, dinner's on me." Only later did I learn that her daughter had taken her own life. They hadn't been able to save her. Back in my apartment, I packed my things. I barely owned anything; everything fit neatly into two suitcases. I wasn't sure where to stash them yet. Mrs. Gable offered to keep them in her spare room until I returned. Grateful and a bit embarrassed, I handed her some cash as a storage fee. My one-way flight was booked for early tomorrow morning. It was still early, and I intended to get a good, peaceful rest. Just as I lay down, the doorbell rang. Lucas's excited voice boomed through the door: "Autumn, open up! We're getting married tomorrow, why aren't you in a rush?" "I'm taking you to pick out your wedding dress right now!"I sighed, dragging myself out of bed to change, and followed Lucas out. Just as I reached to open the passenger side door, I noticed someone was already sitting there. Chloe flashed the engagement ring on her finger and smiled brightly: "Sorry, Autumn." "I've never worn a wedding dress before, so I begged Lucas to let me tag along and try some on. You don't mind, right?" I glanced at Lucas. His eyes darted away, muttering a vague, "Yeah," before hurrying me: "Chloe's just curious, that's all. Hop in, Autumn, we're running out of time." I gave a quiet, self-mocking laugh, stepped back, and got into the backseat instead. "I don't mind. Let's go together." The car pulled up outside a private, high-end bridal boutique. Racks of breathtaking designer gowns lined the showroom, giving me the fleeting, cruel illusion that happiness was actually within reach. I pointed to the gown that caught my eye first and went into the fitting room. When the consultant pulled the curtain open, I saw genuine adoration in Lucas's eyes for the very first time. He looked up at me, his voice slightly raspy: "Autumn, I..." "Lucas! How do I look in this one? Isn't it gorgeous?" That look in his eyes barely lasted two seconds. Chloe instantly stole the spotlight, and Lucas snapped out of his daze like a startled animal. He spun around to shower Chloe with attention, watching her try on dress after dress. Still wearing that bridal gown, I sat quietly in an armchair in the corner of the first floor. I pulled out my phone and snapped a selfie. It looked nice. Even if I was only wearing it for myself, it was still beautiful. It was nearly dark by the time Chloe finally settled on a dress. Only when Lucas went up to pay did he remember that I, the actual bride, was still there. When he came down to look for me, he found Ethan standing beside me, having arrived at some point without anyone noticing. Ethan was talking to me, looking at me with a soft smile: "Autumn, that gown really suits you." I gave a flat, polite nod. Remembering how he had dumped me right before our own planned wedding multiple times, I had no desire to chat. Ethan seemed to sense my coldness. After a long pause, he asked hesitantly: "Do you... really want to marry Lucas?" His question caught me off guard. I froze for a moment, then let out a slightly silly, hollow laugh. "Yes." "Lucas told me he loves me." "I just want to marry someone who loves me." That was the first time I ever saw hesitation and inner turmoil on Ethan's usually ruthless face. He seemed desperate to say something. "Autumn, I could..." "Ethan!" Before Ethan could finish, Lucas rushed over and cut him off. Lucas glared warily at his older brother, subtly stepping in front of me. "Ethan, what are you doing here?" "You came to pick up Chloe, right? She's upstairs. You should go up." With that, Lucas grabbed my hand and led me out to the car. Just before I stepped out at my apartment, Lucas mysteriously pressed a small velvet box into my hand. I opened it. Inside rested an antique ring. "It belonged to my mother. I had it resized to your finger last night." "Autumn, I love you." "If I ever mess up in the future, could you ever forgive me?" I took the box. "I could." "But if you lie to me, I will never forgive you." Turning around, I walked toward the building entrance. Feeling a sudden pull, Lucas jumped out of the car and called after me: "Autumn!" I truly believed that in that split second, Lucas wanted to come clean. Yet after wrestling with himself, all he managed to say was: "Goodnight. Wait for me to come marry you tomorrow." "Goodnight." I answered calmly as his car drove away into the distance. I carried the garment bag with the wedding dress inside, placing it neatly beside the ring box on the table, along with a digital voice recorder. I shut the door and headed straight to the airport. The terminal was virtually empty in the dead of night. Leaning back against the waiting area seat, I stared at the selfie of me in the wedding dress. After staring at it for a long time, I finally hit delete. Autumn Brooks. Stop begging to be loved. As the plane climbed smoothly into the night sky, looking down at the city lights shrinking below, I closed my eyes and whispered a wish for sunny skies ahead. Meanwhile, back at the penthouse, Ethan tossed and turned. Knowing that Lucas planned to abandon me at the altar tomorrow, Ethan grabbed his phone, desperate to warn me. But just as his thumb hovered over my name, Dr. Miller's call lit up his screen first. "Ethan, the emergency lab results for those pills you sent over last night just came in." Ethan's heart plummeted inexplicably: "What is it?" Dr. Miller's tone was frantic: "Ethan, did you mix something up?" "This isn't for migraines. This is a high-dose, clinical-grade antidepressant." "Judging by the dosage, this patient is in an exceptionally critical state. I strongly recommend immediate psychiatric hospitalization. It's highly probable the patient is already exhibiting high-risk behavior." Ethan gripped his phone, his mind detonating into static. In utter disbelief, he pressed: "Explain that to me. What do you mean by high-risk behavior?" "Suicide."