Live Comments Saved Me From My Snake Cousin

My boyfriend, Ethan, and I had already agreed that our parents would finally meet on my birthday. Out of nowhere, my cousin Victoria came running over to me. "Chloe, Ethan told me he prepared a massive surprise gift for you this time!" "And guess what? There’s this couple vlog contest trending right now with a hundred-thousand-dollar grand prize!" "If you film an unboxing video of whatever he got you, you’ll definitely go viral and win!" My eyes lit up, and I was just about to say yes when a floating line of glowing text flashed right before my eyes. [Major spoiler alert! The most tragic female lead of the year is about to log in!] I blinked hard, thinking my eyes were playing tricks on me. Just as I opened my mouth to speak, another comment popped up in midair. [My heart aches for her. She's about to get ruined by that snake of a cousin!] Before I could even process it, more floating comments flooded my vision. [In one year, Chloe dies in a brutal car crash on her twenty-fourth birthday.] [Her cousin steals the deed to her dream house, hooks up with her boyfriend of three years, and goes public with him before Chloe's body is even cold in the ground.] Instantly, my vision went dark, and I nearly slipped off my vanity chair. "Chloe, what’s wrong?" "Why do you look so pale?" Victoria reached out and shook my arm. "Is your blood sugar low? Let me get you some sweet juice." I stared at her "concerned" face, my stomach churning with pure revulsion. The comments kept scrolling. [Look at her fake innocent act. Hollywood owes this girl an Oscar.] [She’s the one! She swapped the gift! She replaced the deed to a multi-million-dollar penthouse with a chipped, nine-dollar plastic music box!] [I'm so mad! Wake up, girl! Don't let her fool you!] I took a deep breath. If these floating comments were real... Then Victoria, standing right in front of me, was a venomous viper. I couldn't blow my cover yet. My mind raced until I finally came up with a counterattack. I forced a weak, fragile smile onto my face. "I'm fine... Just a little nervous, I guess." I gripped the vanity table and pulled myself up, letting my voice sound deliberately shaky. "Victoria, I think your idea is amazing." "Let’s do the unboxing tomorrow at the party, right in front of everyone." "It'll finally show all those judgmental relatives who say Ethan isn't good enough for me just how much he truly loves me." [???] [Can she not see our comments? Why is she jumping straight into the trap?!] [It's over, she didn't believe it. She's doomed.] [No, please! Look at us! Don't fall for it!] A chorus of panic erupted across the floating screen. Meanwhile, an uncontainable gleam of triumph flashed in Victoria's eyes. "That's wonderful! Chloe, don't worry about a thing!" "I promise I’ll make tomorrow huge. Everyone is going to be so jealous of you!" I sneered coldly on the inside. Fine. Let's see. At tomorrow's birthday party... Who is going to end up as the ultimate laughingstock?My parents rented a private banquet hall at a luxury hotel for my birthday. Victoria was already floating between the guests, chatting up everyone in the room. She always had this habit of subtly copying everything I did. In the past, I just thought she was close to me. Now, with the spoilers floating before my eyes, every single move she made reeked of hidden motives. She didn't just want to copy me. She wanted to replace me. "Chloe, happy birthday!" She strutted right over to me and gave a little twirl. "How do you like my outfit today?" "You're the star of the show today, so as your older cousin, I couldn't embarrass you, right?" [Here we go, the classic 'flexing a cheap knockoff' routine.] [She is obsessed with wearing Chloe's old clothes. Is she trying to roleplay as a rich girl?] [Gross. Look at that smug face. Anyone would think she owns the venue.] Reading the savage commentary in front of me, I almost burst out laughing. I pressed my lips together. Then, I slipped on a sweet, innocent expression. "You look stunning, Victoria. You always look great in everything." "Honestly, that dress looks way more elegant on you than it ever did on me." Victoria froze. She clearly hadn't expected that response. Usually, I would teasingly point out that pure white made her skin tone look dull. She gave me a suspicious once-over. She was searching for any sign of sarcasm. I lowered my eyes, putting on a slightly hurt pout. "I used to be so immature, always bickering with you." "Now that I’m a year older, I realize family harmony is more important than anything else." "Besides, you've always treated me so well. I'm never going to pick fights with you again." A smug wave of superiority washed over Victoria's face. She patted my shoulder reassuringly. "I'm glad you've finally matured." "And don't worry about Ethan." "If he gives you something cheap or embarrassing, just own it gracefully. Don't let your pride get the best of you." "Worst case, I'll step in and cover for you. I'll just say the gift was from me." "My boyfriend doesn't make as much as Ethan anyway, so nobody will judge me." [Holy crap, the toxicity is practically dripping off her!] [She's priming Chloe in advance to accept a garbage gift. This woman is more calculating than a supercomputer.] [Wait, isn't her so-called 'rich entrepreneur boyfriend' just a married scam artist?] [LMAO, a scammer and a thief. Truly a match made in hell.] So that was it. The boyfriend she bragged about every single day was actually a married fraud. I fought back the urge to call her out right then and there. Instead, I looked at her with pure, teary-eyed gratitude. "Thank you, Victoria. You're the best." "Of course, silly. What are cousins for?" Victoria patted my hand, looking thoroughly pleased with herself. At three in the afternoon, Ethan walked through the doors holding a bouquet of rare blue roses. "Happy birthday, Chloe." He handed me the flowers. Then, he naturally took my hand in his. My heart melted instantly. The phrase "dies in a brutal car crash at twenty-four" from the comments stabbed through my chest like a jagged blade. I had come so close to losing him forever. "Ethan... I missed you so much." My voice trembled slightly. Ethan blinked in surprise. A moment later, the warmth in his eyes deepened. He squeezed my hand tightly and leaned in close to whisper in my ear. "Silly girl, we literally saw each other yesterday." "I missed you too." "Just wait. I've got a surprise for you." I nodded firmly. Not far away, Victoria practically shoved her way between us. She slipped her arm through mine with practiced familiarity. "Ethan, you're finally here! Chloe has been talking about you all morning." "Did you bring the big gift? We've all been dying to see it!" The second she said that, my mom walked over. Her brow was furrowed with slight annoyance. "Victoria, mind your words." "What do you mean, 'dying to see it'? You make our family sound so superficial. It's the thought that counts." Mom said that out loud. Yet her eyes drifted, completely out of her control, toward the corner of the room. Sitting there was a massive gift box, reaching halfway up to a person's chest. Ethan had arranged for a courier to deliver it earlier that afternoon. By now, it had become the undisputed focal point of the entire hall. Victoria had gotten what she wanted. She quickly hooked her arm through my mom's, putting on a cutesy voice. "Oh, Auntie, I was just teasing!" "I'm just excited for Chloe! I heard Ethan spent months preparing this. We're all naturally curious, that's all." The surrounding relatives began gathering around. "That's right, Chloe, open it up! Let us share the joy!" "Young people these days are so romantic." "Ethan has always been such a solid, honest guy. He definitely wouldn't let our Chloe down." I walked over to the massive box. Victoria whipped out her phone and hit record. She gave me a radiant, encouraging smile. "Chloe, I'm filming the footage for your TikTok vlog contest right now!" "Keep your expressions natural, okay? Let's nail it in one take!" I took a deep, steadying breath. I looked at Ethan in the crowd, his face full of quiet anticipation. Then I looked at Victoria, whose eyes were glittering with malicious delight. [Here it comes! The greatest public humiliation of the decade is about to unfold!] [Someone hold my hand, my blood pressure can't take this!] [A moment of silence for our girl's dying relationship.] I glanced at the frantic floating comments. The corner of my lips curled into a cold, sharp smirk. The real show was only just beginning."May I have everyone's attention, please?" I picked up the microphone from the podium and cleared my throat. Dozens of eyes locked onto me in an instant. Victoria stood to the side with her arms crossed, a smirk tugging at the edge of her lips. "Thank you so much to all my family and friends for coming to celebrate my birthday today." I turned my gaze warmly toward Ethan, who was standing beside me. "And a very special thank you to my boyfriend, Ethan. Thank you for everything you put together for me today." Ethan smiled back, his eyes full of adoration. I paused, directing everyone’s attention back to the massive cardboard box. "I know everyone here is dying to know what’s inside this box." "To be honest, Ethan told me a while ago that this gift is something built to carry our entire future together." I deliberately hyped it up. Whispers immediately broke out among the crowd. "Carry their future? Did he buy her a car?" "Could a car even fit in a box that size? Maybe it's a luxury home appliance set!" Victoria chimed in from the side, her voice dripping with sweet condescension. It wasn't too loud, but it was just loud enough for everyone around to hear. "Maybe he filled the whole box with giant stuffed teddy bears! Girls love that kind of cheesy stuff, right?" Her comment drew a wave of polite chuckles from the relatives. [Look at this snake. The moment her trap is set, she immediately starts belittling the guy.] [A room full of stuffed animals... only her shallow brain would think of that. Talk about low-class.] I ignored her completely. I smiled at the room and spoke into the mic. "My cousin Victoria suggested that I film this unboxing and submit it to a couple's vlog contest to win the hundred-thousand-dollar prize." "So right now, I invite everyone to witness this surprise with me." I caught the fleeting freeze in Victoria's smile. She masked it quickly, returning to her poised stance. Under everyone's eager eyes, I picked up a pair of scissors. I sliced through the heavy packaging tape along the top of the box. The flaps fell open. Inside rested an exquisite, handcrafted walnut trunk. Gasps rippled through the room. "Look at that trunk! That looks ridiculously expensive!" "Look at the grain of the wood and the brass fittings. That’s custom designer work! The trunk alone must be worth thousands!" Ethan looked visibly relieved. He stepped closer, gazing at me tenderly. "Go on, open it." I gave him a soft nod. My fingers brushed against the brass latch. Click. The latch snapped open. Slowly, deliberately, I lifted the heavy wooden lid. Instantly, everyone’s expressions froze. Sitting dead center in that luxurious trunk was a cheap, flimsy, peeling plastic music box. The sheer contrast between the gorgeous trunk and that piece of trash was grotesque. Dead silence fell over the hall. The air felt like it had turned to solid ice. [Holy sht.] [Holy sht x 10000000.] [My eyes! The visual damage is fatal!] [LMAO, I'm sorry, I can't breathe! Did she buy that off Wish for two dollars with free shipping?!] [Hang in there, Chloe! We're with you!] A solid ten seconds ticked by in agonizing stillness. Finally, someone in the crowd let out a stifled snort. "After all that hype... that's it? A plastic toy?" "I thought it was some kind of treasure. Is Ethan playing a joke on us?" "Joke? Sounds more like he bit off more than he could chew and tried to act rich!" My dad's face had already turned the color of a bruised plum. My mom looked like she desperately wanted the floor to open up and swallow her whole. And Ethan? He was completely paralyzed. He lunged forward. He grabbed the plastic music box in disbelief. He turned it over and over, inspecting it frantically. Shock and confusion were written all over his face. "This is impossible... How is this here? Where’s my real gift? Chloe, I swear—" He was panicking so hard his words were tripping over each other.Victoria had to bite her inner cheek to suppress her laughter. Stepping forward, she adopted an intensely sympathetic tone. "Oh, Chloe, sweetie, don't be upset." "It's a gift! It's the thought that counts, right?" "Sure, the music box looks a little... cheap, but I'm sure Ethan spent a lot of time picking it out, didn't you, Ethan?" She turned toward the dazed man with faux pity. "Ethan, don't take it to heart." "We all know your family isn't wealthy. Putting together a big setup like this was already a huge effort on your part." "Chloe isn't a materialistic girl. She won't blame you." The whispers intensified. The guests looked at us with a toxic mix of pity, disdain, and pure schadenfreude. If I hadn't seen the spoilers, I probably would have broken down right then and there. Tears, accusations, a public breakup—exactly what Victoria had scripted. But now... I lifted my chin. My eyes locked directly onto Victoria's smug, victorious gaze. And then, right before everyone’s stunned eyes, I threw my head back and laughed out loud. The entire room went blank. Including Ethan. And especially Victoria. [???] [Why is she laughing? Did she lose her mind from anger?] [Wait, this isn't right! This wasn't in the script!] I pulled the mic to my lips, laughing so hard my shoulders shook. I reached out and wrapped my arm snugly around Ethan's. Then, I projected my voice clearly into the microphone: "Hahaha! Ethan, you lost! I told you I could fool you!" Ethan froze. "Wait... what?" The look on his face was the definition of absolute bafflement. I turned back to the equally bewildered guests, smiling brightly as I explained: "I am so sorry, everyone! Please forgive us! Actually, this was just a prank Ethan and I cooked up!" "We made a bet to see if I could pull off a prank gift at my party and trick him into thinking his actual present got lost." "Look at his face! He looked like he was about to burst into tears! Clearly, I won the bet!" As I spoke, I gave Ethan's arm a playful, triumphant tug. A weird, heavy silence settled over the room once more. After a few beats, an aunt hesitantly asked, "So... that plastic music box is fake? Chloe, you put it in there yourself?" "Of course!" I replied without missing a beat. I reached out and grabbed Victoria's hand, pulling her into the spotlight with me. "In fact, I specifically asked Victoria to help me buy this cheap little toy off Wish!" "Victoria even told me back then that it looked hilariously tacky and would be the perfect prop to freak him out. Right, Victoria?" I turned toward her, beaming with pure, innocent affection. Victoria's entire face turned to stone. She was completely pinned under the scrutiny of fifty pairs of eyes. She instinctively tried to yank her hand back, but my grip on her fingers was ironclad. She wanted to deny it. But only half an hour ago, she had loudly proclaimed that she would 'cover for me' and preached about how 'the thought is what counts.' If she claimed she knew nothing about the music box now, wouldn't that completely contradict her previous performance? Her mouth opened and closed like a dying fish. Finally, she managed to squeak out a strained, muffled sentence through gritted teeth. "...Y-yeah... It really did look... pretty convincing." "See?" I winked playfully at the crowd and released her sweaty, trembling hand. "Victoria knows me best! When it comes to finding the perfect prank props, she's the ultimate wingwoman!" [GENIUS! ABSOLUTE MASTERCLASS!] [She turned the tables in two seconds! The snake just got framed as an accomplice to a prank!] [Look at her face! It looks like she just swallowed a whole hive of wasps but has to smile and say it tastes like honey!] [HAHAHAHAHA her expression! She's turning fifty shades of green!] [Ethan: Who am I? Where am I? What just happened?] Looking at the explosion of cheering comments in front of me, and then at Victoria’s violently twitching cheek, the suffocating anger in my chest finally found its first release. Sorry, Victoria. Today, the person who ends up crying isn't going to be me.